Explain John Proctors Struggle with his Conscience :: Salem Witch Trials The Crucible Essays

Explain John Proctor's Struggle with his Conscience Conscience The conscience, the knowledge of right and wrong that affects actions and behaviour; the senses of guilt or virtue indeed by actions, behaviour etc. An innermost thought. (PH English dictionary) John Proctor has a terrible struggle with his conscience, particularly towards the end of the play. John proctors conscience is tell him that he shouldn't give into the pressure of the court, that he should stand proud and not tell the court lies. His conscience is telling him he shouldn't lie or defy the court and then his death, hanging from the noose, can be a proud one, accepted with honour after making his love and more importantly his peace with God. However his natural instinct, given to him upon his birth is telling him to lie. That he should lose his good name, confess to dealing with witchcraft. Telling him to lose some, perhaps all the respect people have for him but to keep his life. To lose his dignity but to keep his life. To live to see his children grow up, to see his unborn child be born, to watch his wife grow old with him. But most importantly to live, and to be free, and not to experience death till he is older. Live and lie, losing your dignity and all the respect you've earned, or die, but keep your good name, and let your children grow up with a good name. Leaving your life with an unblemished name. John chose death, although before he chose death he was prepared to choose life, he wanted to live, yet more than this he wanted an unblemished name. More importantly than this he wanted his children, and their children, and their children's children to have a name to be proud of. Proctor. He did not want them to be left with the name of a witch. Because it is my name (The Crucible, Act 4) John Proctor says the above quote, which simply reinforces everything I wrote earlier. John does not want to give up his name; he cannot have another in this life. Better to have one unblemished name. Than to have hundreds of names all tainted in one way or another. John does not want to give up his good name; he would rather give up his life, which we see in the rather gruesome and sudden ending of the play. This shows John Proctors personal struggle with himself. He wanted to live, yet he also wanted to keep his good name. He couldn't do both and in the end he chose his name. He was fighting with himself right